last paper to go.. but ive absolutely no mood to get any info into my saturated brain.. its all stuffed with lotsa junk and i tink the only way to get them out will be to have lotsa fun!!! cant wait for tml or rather today 530pm to arrive.. once the clock strikes.. term 2b shall end!! dere n den.. woohoo~

oh! n ive decided.. i noe this may sounds so damn stupid.. (i noe alot pple cant wait to sae tt i actually am.. oh shut up!!) i shall be who i am! i shall learn to ignore how pple feel or think about me because of wat i sae.. how i dress.. how i act.. well tts me ya.. RENA!

ive realised all dese years.. ive been like trying to accommodate to people's needs.. comprising to pple's request.. n only now den i discover this is wrong.. ive nv really tink of wat i wan.. always tink tt its okay to give in to others.. and its so serious that for now i duno who i really am anymore.. compromising can be a strength as it reduces many conflicts.. but too much.. makes a person lost her or his identity..

well.. so...i tink.. whatever it is.. the most impt ting on earth now is to have fun while im young! anw.. life's short!! people.. enjoy!! (im not drunk) hah. oh.. dere's once i even ve this lill thought.. even if it is to destroy my life.. i shall be the one to do it and not allow others kill it slowly by hurting my fragile heart.. (aw..) sound scary hur.. ever thought of taking up smoking and all.. but oh well.. i noe there are still love ones ard.. i wldnt bear to see them being hurt..

oh! n for that terrible mistake ive done (mentioned in previous entry).. i will treat it as a super valuable lesson.. n definitely NOT make that stupid mistake again.. i repeat.. NEVER!! i acted so cool about it.. but in actual fact.. im SOOOOOooOOOoooOOOoooOOOo (can nv show how much even thou i put so much OooOOo in it!!) affected!

"hey myfren.. thx so much for being dere when i needed sumone.. but nw if you found that you're being ignored.. im probably avoiding you.. perhaps for the time being.. perhaps for long.. im nt sure.. jus feel that you ve become a stranger overnight.. a scary one.. i thought tt you are still who u are.. but im so wrong! u r not u anymore! stuff that you said.. that everything have changed.. n how u react to the incident.. that dere's nth wrong (at least tts how it looks to me.. perhaps because we are in different positions).. simply scares me off.. yep.. i need time to figure things out.. rmb.. time can heal.. it can heal injuries now n the old ones (i should be reminded of how it lead us to wher it had lead us now..) that jus been once again brought up by you... "

i shall be the independent girl that my guy wants me to be.. thanks for all the freedom you give me.. n perhaps the absolute confidence you have in me.. n the coolest attitude you have of not expressing your feelings now n then cause u want to make it special.. but i heard from people.. when one cant get dependent on their loves one when he or she needs.. or not constantly be reminded or moved by their partners that they are loved.. the freedom only gives them the opportunity to be astray.......... will our love stay stronger than me going astray.. tts for u to find out and for me to noe..

yep.. tts for this morning.. i love to write at this time.. when lotsa thoughts flow in.. ya.. like i cld still rmb yst dream.. wher i dreamt of finishing my MS paper.. n john smsed me.. "hey.. john here.. not long john silver john.. but john.... blah blah blah.." cant believe in my dream i can still have those lame shits.. urgh.. waste my time of not slpin properly la.. in the dream i even had a tooth droppin off (rmb someone telling me dreaming of teeth dropping indicates that the person is insecure.. how true is it??!!).. so sucky..

lets pray TWC paper is easy~~~ *yawn.. signing off..
xoxo (no way im gg to be such poser! ha.)
RENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!